Adeptus Minor and Ego Inflation

So around Halloween I finally finished the Portal Grade, and my magical career has been a bit of a bumpy road since then.

I've done a lot of work with skrying, including:

1. Skrying kabbalisic elemental planes.
2. Enochian Aethyrs
3. General black mirror experiments.

I've also done some experiments with evocations and talismans and have gotten pretty decent results on both fronts.

The downside to all of this, unfortunately, is that I seemed to lose most of the balance that I had obtained in the portal grade. I began obsessing over Nietzschian "Ubermensch" ideals, thinking that I was some sort of God among men. This led to bitterness, more harshly conservative political views than I've ever held, and an overall lack of material grounding. Eventually, I even got burned out of doing the basic rituals.

So the past few weeks, I've been doing some Liber MMM motionlessness and focusing on breath exercises, and I think it has supplied a good amount of grounding that I have lost. I've come to realize that I was lusting too much for results, and not just trying to have a symbiotic relationship with the symbol systems and metaphysical world which I'm immersed in.

So now, I think I'm ready to dive back in. I have a few main goals as of now.

1) Continued exploration of the Enochian System using the DuQuette technique (I think I'm going to ditch a lot of the GD methods for good).
2) Learn the Runic system. I wish to get more in touch with the pagan side of my heritage, and I think this basic reboot is a good place to start.
3) Continue to build concentration - I'll continue doing Liber MMM exercises on days when I'm not doing evocations.

Things are looking a lot better than they ever have before...